Begin Again

"Routines as such are dangerous, because they easily becom gods in their own right, threatening the very goals for which they were set up.  Broadly speaking it can be said that it is well to start the day right [i.e., giving the day to God].  But it is ALWAYS possible to begin again, should the day begin with error." [emphasis mine] -- A Course in Miracles; Manual for Teachers 16, 2:5-7

We're pretty hard on ourselves.  We set unrealistic expectations for our bodies and our minds, all of which are based on goals and actions out there, with the world as we imagine it.  The problem is, they're unrealistic because they're not true, not because we didn't do it right.  Even the goals and actions we seem to acheive or approve of will disappoint sooner or later, because they're based on the false gods referenced in the above quote... earthly rituals to the gods of diet, relationships, pleasure, or finance.  But we can begin again.  Any instant. 

One way we remain in bondage to egoic pursuit is the lie that it's not possible to begin again, so we might as well make the best of what we've got.  We'd better make this body work well, because we won't get another one.  We'd better subsume ourselves to this dysfunctional relationship or we'll be alone.  We'd better be frugal and only spend on necessities for ourselves, because the economy shows no mercy.  It's every man (or woman) for themselves.

How might this perspective soften and change if we felt innocent?  If we knew that every holy instant we are born anew?  If we really stopped for an instant... really allowed the Real to shine from everyone and everything?  If we stopped writing the script of unrealistic and false expectations?  All we're giving up is the illusion of protecting illusions about ourselves and the world we think we see.

I've come to realize that the only task I have before me every day, no matter what it looks like, is to let go of everything I think I know, to let the Real shine through every appearance.  In the words of Mary Baker Eddy: "... depart from the material sense, into the spiritual sense of Being."  A Course in Miracles calls this process 'forgiveness', the shedding of the false self.  What does that mean?  It means letting go of the evidence of the thinking mind, the evidence of the physical senses, and being fully present and aware NOW.  In the midst of that awareness is our true knowing, our Spiritual Self.  Everything that seems to be happening out there is actually a play of consciousness within the One Mind, the Self, the Allness of what we sometimes call God.  Fully present awareness, without condition, is key.

So we begin again, every holy instant, by forgiving, by releasing, by letting go of every routine and conditioned response, every bit of sensory data.  What remains is pure Awareness, and the Grace of our true Self.